User-Written IELTS Essay: Nowadays, more and more people are moving from the countryside to cities, which

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Note: Both the topic and the essay were created by one of our users.

Nowadays, in this fast-moving era, people are moving lớn thành phố areas, and their number increases day by day. People are finding a better lifestyle and education, so sánh they move from the countryside lớn the thành phố. The government takes action and imposes rules lớn reduce this number.

In this time, every person is thinking of improving their lifestyle, so sánh they are moving lớn cities for better education for their children, more employment opportunities, and increased knowledge. City area companies are available for easy job access. The authorities provide well-maintained roads, sewage, and water management, and school buildings are easily available, so sánh more and more people are moving lớn the thành phố area. The thành phố area provides amenities lượt thích gardens lớn reduce stress, and children can play their games easily.

On the other hand, people moving lớn cities from the countryside reduce and stop the channel lớn develop the countryside area. The government should declare Special Economic Zones (SEZ) in rural areas and provide subsidies and interest-free loans for farmers. They should impose rules for the sale and purchase of agricultural products lớn increase their rate. They should provide school buildings with technology, making better lifestyle, education, and work easily available, so sánh people are not leaving their towns.

In conclusion, people are moving lớn cities from the countryside for a better standard of living and children’s education. The government should develop the countryside area and stop people from moving, reducing the imbalance between cities and the countryside.

Word Count: 244

Word Count: 247

Overall Band Score

6

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue lớn challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 7

moving: 6

their: 6

countryside: 5

better: 4

education: 4

cities: 4

should: 4

lifestyle: 3

government: 3

reduce: 3

available: 3

provide: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words


Task Response

6.5

The essay addresses the reasons for the movement of people from the countryside lớn cities and suggests some measures lớn reduce it. However, the arguments presented lack depth and are somewhat repetitive. To improve, provide more specific examples and elaborate on the consequences of this migration in both rural and urban areas. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.


Coherence & Cohesion

6

The essay is somewhat organized, with a clear introduction, body toàn thân paragraphs, and conclusion. However, there are some coherence issues due lớn repetitive ideas and lack of smooth transitions between paragraphs. Try lớn vary sentence structures and use linking words lớn improve the flow of ideas.


Lexical Resource

6

There is a decent range of vocabulary used throughout the essay. However, some words and phrases could be more precise and sophisticated. Try lớn incorporate more advanced vocabulary lớn enhance the overall lexical resource. Additionally, watch out for minor errors in word choice and usage.


Grammatical Range & Accuracy

6

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While there are no major grammatical errors, some sentences could be more varied lớn showcase a wider range of grammatical structures. Pay attention lớn subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency for improved accuracy.

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